


Holy Holy Holy

by Slim Shady (NoraPenblood)



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: M/M, Mostly just sad, alcohol mention, drug mention, if u know these two you know what youre in for, nico is sad and he does not like it, uh, yamorico
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-08
Updated: 2015-04-08
Packaged: 2018-03-21 21:01:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3704701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoraPenblood/pseuds/Slim%20Shady
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clowns aren't supposed to cry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Holy Holy Holy

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for ali @clownfvcker.tumblr.com

Yamori was drunk. He was drunk and Nico was a little high, but Yamori was laying on top of him, heavy and hot and maybe a little sweaty. It was so dark in the room that they could only see the silhouettes of each other, eyes glinting in the streetlights from the window. 

It’d been a long, easy night. Lazily sitting around with the people Nico might cautiously call friends. At some point the others had left after Yamori had started laughing, tugging Nico in close to his side, grabbing his thighs with those huge hands and then heaving him into his lap like he weighed nothing. 

He was happiest when he was drunk, always affectionate at first before he showed his teeth.

Nico’s head had been spinning already and it was his favorite thing when he felt those teeth brush his ear, the threat unspoken but enough to make him shiver. He barely heard the door shut behind the rest of Pierrot and thanked god that Naki wasn’t here to interrupt.

Now they were back in almost the same position, but this time Yamori was looming over him, like a massive god in the dark, pressing Nico into the soft mattress. He felt sleep-heavy and blissful - he’d been fucked into a state of euphoria and he had no real idea how much time had passed since they’d moved from the “living room” to Yamori’s own bedroom. 

He assumed, when Yamori started moving on top of him again, that he was going to feel a little more pain before the night was through. He’d already braced himself for the hot rush of blood. 

He did not expect the hand on his face to be so gentle. Nothing about this man was gentle. He did not expect his words either - soft and slurred and heartbreakingly quiet. 

“You’re beautiful, you know.” 

The expression on Yamori’s face was impossible to make out in the shadows, only the glitter of those beady eyes and the contours of his cheeks visible to the ghoul beneath him. This wasn’t good. This had swiftly gone from fun to decidedly not. Nico felt his heart lurch uncomfortably.

He didn’t want this. He didn’t want this - it was too intimate, too personal. Yamori had been safe. Yamori was supposed to fill him up, not to rip more holes. Not to expose the gaping wounds he was so insecure about. 

The sob was quiet, and he muffled it behind his hand. This was a nightmare and suddenly everything was too sweet, too gentle, too cloyingly kind. It was smothering. He squirmed under his weight, feeling weak from the drugs he’d taken and from the ache now swelling in his heart. 

It was a small mercy when he felt Yamori sag on top of him, heard him start to snore. At least if he was unconscious he wouldn’t be able to hear the clown cry. He shuts his eyes and, begrudgingly, presses his face into the larger ghoul’s neck. His makeup was smeared enough as it was and the mascara stains wouldn’t be discernable, he hoped.

They always made messes, Yamori wouldn’t know what had happened. He wouldn’t remember his own sweet lies. It was better like that.

After all, nobody was allowed to see beneath Nico’s mask, not even the people he allowed to see his guts.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!! If you liked this, my blog is striderfvcker.tumblr.com
> 
> My SFW ao3 account is http://archiveofourown.org/users/striderfvcker/pseuds/striderfvcker


End file.
